Dinner Bells

The other day one of those emails came when a friend asks a bevy of friends 25 random questions and you see their answers and everyone knows just a little more about each other…you have seen these surveys, I am sure. One of the frequently-asked questions demands one’s favorite smells. And you learn that your junior-high locker mate likes the aroma of fresh bread, or you learn that the woman in back of you at church melts under the scent of orange blossoms. A colleague has a jones-ing for the beauty of the smell of the beach. Well, on this survey I encountered a new question…what is a favorite sound of yours?

I thought about it, and it was actually a little harder than the more conventional “smell” query. What sounds do we like? Traffic? Church bells? The call to prayer? Children’s laughter? The clarinet? Applause? The crack of a bat at a baseball game?

I decided to be a little smart aleck, and I responded, “My favorite sound is the dinner bell.”

I’m sure once in awhile I have actually heard a dinner bell (I remember that Aunt Audrey had one at her house out on Cliff Road, and I loved clanging that thing, once in awhile stirring Uncle Russell to come in early even when the repast had not been finished) but the idea of a dinner bell, or certainly the notion of dinner is dear to my heart. And why not choose a sound that reminds me of meals and fellowship as a favorite sound??

Students were asking me what I planned to do for the summer and I said, “Talk and eat! What better way to spend the summer!”

So with the idea of a dinner bell in mind, I thought I would share some of the interesting meals I have had in the last week or so. While I don’t believe any of these meals began with the wonderful clanging of a bell, it is always there metaphorically for me, at least.

The end of a school year always creates interesting dinners. There are farewell parties, and galas, and gatherings both large and small to commemorate the (hopefully successful) conclusion of another year of toiling in the proverbial trenches. This year is certainly no different, and the variety of the meals, the many dishes, and the socializing and reminiscing all adds to the (dare I say it??) poetry of a dinner experience.

The first dinner about which I will relay is also the most, well, the most everything. It is the largest of these meals, the most over-the-top, just the most, the most, the most.

Along with a small handful of other teachers, I had been invited to a dinner on the evening of our first graduation at the Grand Hyatt hotel. I had some inkling that it was going to be a lavish affair since I knew what the tickets cost. But I had nooooo idea of the spectacle and splashy ambiance until after I arrived! The ticket had said the party/dinner began at 9:00, so I arrived with my two colleagues at 9:10—hoping that the buffet would open soon, Hey, it had been a long day, and I was hungry! When we arrived, no other guests were to be seen…okay, we were seated at Table #50, way, way, way back in the corner of the humongous ballroom for the party. There were at least 75, maybe more, staff on hand to tend to the guest list of 600 (remember—the graduating class was 84!). The centerpieces were sights unto themselves. I have seen entire gardens larger than the centerpieces! Well, I learned that Arabs were certainly never going to arrive on time for an event like this, that would be seen as gauche. Buffet? Not for a long way off! We contented ourselves with the bread sticks and the ranch dressing on the table. At about 9:45 the place began to fill up, but the mood was unlike any other graduation party I have attended. Mind you, I have over 20 years experience with graduation parties, and I have been to country clubs, and barbecues, marvelously catered, and more humble graduation parties, but this had a mood—especially once the laser lights kicked in, and the World Cup kinda mood set an otherworldly aura. Around 10:00 when the ballroom was pretty packed with families who must have all shopped on Rodeo Drive, an announcer introduced each graduate and the grads paraded in, arm-in-arm with another graduate and they sashayed on a runway with search lights and laser lights and Star Wars-esque music setting the tone. This looked like a scene from a Bollywood movie! Anyway, my colleagues and I had stayed up late the night before patrolling the hallways and gotten up early, and we were pooped. We agreed to leave at 11, and hoped the buffet would do some magic. Well, 11:00 rolled around, and there was no buffet yet, so we left the movie set and headed home, stopping at Chili Ways for our late-night supper. A bit more low-brow than we had anticipated! It was a history-making dinner dance and I am sure the graduates felt special.

The next day was a dinner like the kind I relish the most—a group of dear friends went to someone’s home and relaxed and talked and laughed and ate. The five deans from the Office of Student Life were invited to our friend Reem’s grandmother’s house. Reem is our most loved dean, and her “Tateh,” wanted to make us a Jordanian meal. As much as the five of us love each other, we can count on one hand (sadly) the number of times this year we have been off-campus together for dinner. One of us is always on duty! But we stole about 5 hours away from campus and enjoyed the kind of family meal that just does your soul good. We got to see some of Reem’s family, rejoice and relax in the company of treasured colleagues, and eat and eat and eat. We had the upside chicken dish that has these succulent onions, and we had a rice dish with pistachios and beef that taste the way a Grandma’s roast is supposed to melt in your mouth. And we had the pickled everything as the Arabs like to add, then we had subsequent courses with teas and desserts and coffees and fruits. Afterwards we sat in their garden, right under a lemon tree (by the way, even the leaves smelled of the heavenly scent) and enjoyed the perfect cool Jordanian evening.

Last Thursday I accepted an invitation to the Korean Ambassador to Jordan’s house. I just re-read that sentence. Yes, that is true. Little ole me, from Cincinnati, had an official invitation to a diplomat’s house. Pretty exciting circles I run in, eh what??! I will tell you why: the son of the Ambassador has lived on my hallway this year, about 12 feet from my apartment door, and the family invited a small group of KA people to their home. Oh, I do love a fancy meal too. There was a comfortable formality about everything, and right over there was the American Ambassador (his son is a friend of the other guy’s son) and his wife. This food was something—I knew it was going to be. Koreans know how to make beef sing! There were some Korean salads and this velvety grilled beef, and the lamb chops of your dreams. After a cocktail hour inside the residence, amidst some beautiful paintings from Korean artists, we repaired to the side yard, done up with tables and lights. Again, one of those desert evenings that has a serene magic. After dinner there were many toasts and tributes to our departing headmaster, the beloved Eric. One of my favorite moments came toward the end of the evening when the American Ambassador came up to Julianne, my table mate, and bashfully admitted he was a huge fan of her late grandfather, the very famous and very talented musician Tito Puente. It was delightful to see this formal, precise, important man show off his knowledge of her grandfather’s life and music, and it made a nice capstone to a beautiful evening at the embassy.

The next day was the Third Annual KA Lunch at the Khalayleh House. This family is one of the most marvelous of all of our families. They have seven sons, and while only one of them attends the school at the moment, we see them often, and over the years, we have come to know this family quite well. I have taught their son Abdullah every day for three years now, but from these luncheons every June (and by the way, they are always the magnificent, Jordanian feast kind of lunches, platters the size of your first car, and hospitality to soothe and delight) we have come to know these seven sons (ranging in age, I believe from 8 to 22) and that integrity, courtesy, enthusiasm, imagination and curiosity are hallmarks of all these sons. The family welcomes us (about 12 of us invited every June) to their home to thank us for a great year…from our arrival and the ensuing tea to the sitting and chatting and catching up with the sons, it is a beautiful afternoon!

Later that night I got a call from colleague Yasser—he was having an impromptu picnic on his porch and hoped I could come. While I had eaten an award-winning amount of lunch, one never dismisses an invitation from Yasser! He is a master of the grill, and makes a chicken that is lip-smackin’ and noteworthy burgers. Yasser is moving in a few days, a recipient of an extraordinary invitation to teach at a brand-new branch of NYU in Abu Dhabi. This was a final opportunity to while away the hours laughing and eating and answering his dinner bell.

The next day was a total day of relaxation (hmmm…I think so was the day before!) and Elizabeth and I had our final Dead Sea Spa Day of the year…dinner that night was in a spectacular setting, high above the Dead Sea on the cliffs at a place called the Dead Sea Panorama. Julianne had invited the deans (another chance to be together off-campus!) to honor Elizabeth’s year and salute her as she heads back for a new job in New York. We met at sunset, sat at a table right at the cliff’s edge, and then dived into the Jordanian mezze that we love…few times in life do you work with a group, a tight-knit group as fantastic and smart and hard-working as this group of deans…we had about 90 minutes to enjoy dinner before heading back to duty in the dorm.

And then…and then…and then…you get the picture of how this week has been. There have been meetings and work going on, but the best parts of the day are these dinners and these opportunities to reflect on the year, enjoy a confidence that we are getting some of this right, and a moment to thank the colleagues who give you the strength to keep the vision in place, and in view.

The next day was a department lunch with the crackerjack History and Social Studies Department to honor Yasser. There were toasts and tributes and the mezze and roasted meats that produce smiles and sighs.

That night Julianne and I went for a casual dinner together in Amman to try out a place that had been suggested as the best wings in Amman. We ordered three dozen wings and rolled up our sleeves to see how that assessment stood. As I made short work of the wings I couldn’t help but marvel at this friend of mine. Several words flashed across my brain as we ate outside laughing and pondering the year. Honor. Thrill. Privilege. Blessing. Treat. Each of these words is accurate to sum up how I have felt working for, and with, Julianne this year. It has been a challenging year, but why not roll up your sleeves for the challenges, and then the wings.

Tomorrow night—dinner with the headmaster and the deans, one last night, before the year draws to a close. It will be delightful. It will be more than a repast, it will be more than a tribute to the year. It will be what a dinner should be.

And so…back to sounds…there is a new sound on campus tonight…a sound that doesn’t occur very often…it is the sound of silence. Earlier today the students cleaned up their rooms and moved out for the summer. It has been since late August since we heard this sound. For a day or two it is beautiful, then the sounds of their silence will be unbearable as we look forward to a return and their return. Then the bells and whistles will begin all over again!